We always say culture takes all hands on deck—and it does. And leadership has to lead the charge.
Your team is a reflection of you.
Depending on the day, that may make you feel proud . . . or slightly horrified.
To avoid distorted funhouse reflections, here are five practical ways to increase your leadership effectiveness—starting with what your team sees, hears, and mirrors every day.
1. Know that your team is always watching
What you do defines what’s actually permitted and expected.
Take vacation? Your team will too. Drift during meetings? So will they. Your posture, your tone, even your hand gestures—your team will reflect them.
This isn’t mimicry out of flattery. It’s human nature. Mirror neurons help us instinctively mirror the behaviors of those in power as a form of survival and success.
Shared identity comes from shared language and mirrored mannerisms. So ask yourself honestly: Do I like what I hear? Do I like what I see?
When you catch yourself thinking, “I wish my team were more accountable / focused / enthusiastic,” try reframing it: “What would it look like if I were more of that? What would I say or do?”
That’s the foundation of leadership effectiveness.
2. Beware of resting frog face
Back when Kris ran a moving company, she installed a mirror in her office—not to check her teeth or hair, but to keep tabs on her expression. As she puts it:
When I’m deep in thought, the corners of my mouth naturally turn down. My “resting frog face” sent the wrong message to the team—disapproval, frustration, detachment—even when I didn’t feel that way.
Non-verbals matter. Eye-rolling, fidgeting, crossed arms, distracted glances—they all send signals.
Notice your natural expressions. Then actively choose what serves the team.
3. Speak on purpose
Your words don’t just echo. They reverberate through the culture.
If you swear, swearing is fair game. If you say “it’s all good,” blind optimism prevails. If you complain there’s never enough time, the whole team starts living in time poverty and uses it as a scapegoat.
On the other hand, if you say, “we’ve got this!" your team believes it.
Your mantras will be repeated. Choose them consciously.
Also, consider tweaking your business-speak. For example, call due dates “finish lines” instead of deadlines. You might rather have your team feel like they’re crossing a finish line, victory arms in the air, than a deadline (a word that comes from the boundary line that if crossed by a prisoner meant they would be shot dead).
4. Don’t unleash the shiny squirrel
As a leader, your words carry weight. More than you think.
That passing idea? Offhand comment? Your team may start running with it instantly. What you say goes. Even a casual “what if…” can lead to whack-a-mole chaos and reshuffled priorities.
So pause before “throwing something out there.” And if you continue, be clear that you're just thinking out loud and don't want anything else from your team but their thoughts.
5. Keep your spark alive
Your energy is contagious—and so is your apathy.
Fake smiles won’t cut it, nor will empty words of encouragement. If you’re simply not feeling it, lean on the people, words, music, and experiences that lift you up, fill your energy bucket, and ground you. Tap into your bigger purpose—and how your work connects to it.
Because leadership effectiveness isn’t just about performance. It’s about presence.
The bottom line?
Be that which you wish to see in your team.
Want to strengthen your leadership effectiveness?
